Today was my first taste of a blatant homophobic remark against me. I knew it was only a matter of time! In fourth period, I began class right off the bat with a quick lecture on parallel lines. They were surprisingly attentive. Being that this is the last period of the day, the students are usually talkative and ready to get out of school. After the lecture, they got practice in working with theorems on parallel lines by making a theorem booklet, then they worked in small groups for the rest of class.
Throughout the small group work, one of my students (Ray) was disrupting class. He kept making animal noises. I firmly reminded him that this was a classroom - not a zoo - and to keep all noises to himself. He did it once more; so, I calmly walked over to him and offered a detention if he couldn't keep his trap shut. He didn't make another noise but, for the rest of class, he kept a stern watch on me.
At the end of class, Ray was talking with a small group of students about how a boy they knew had skipped class. Ray, casually and loudly enough for me to hear, said, "I bet Mr. Howard would skip with him," suggesting that I would engage in inappropriate relations with said student. At first, I was going to let it slide but, after seeing the students' reactions, I quickly pulled him over to my desk. I could see that Ray had been struggling with his homophobia for a while and I decided that this was the time to nip it in the bud.
He sat down in front of me and I began my rant... "Ray, you seem to be under the impression that I am gay or feminine... I say this because I have been hearing these inappropriate and snide comments you've been making about me. I want you to know that these are not acceptable and, if I hear any more of them, you will be sent straight to the office. I have given you respect from day one and there is no excuse for why you can't return the same. I don't care what your beliefs about homosexuality are but, when you enter my classroom, you leave them at the door. Do you understand?"
Mr. Warren was sitting there the whole time and, after I finished, he told Ray to leave the class. I'm glad to know that I have his support.
Throughout this "rant," Ray sat there with a smirk on his face. I hope I got through to him, but only time will tell. One thing's for sure, though: no more Mr. Nice Guy when it's concerned with this issue! =)
I'm proud of you Robbie. Thats a good way to deal with it. And hopefully he will stop. It's really hard, I know. And scary. but i hope it gets better. Luckily haven't had that direct of a problem yet.
ReplyDeleteThanks so much, Chase. I have to say... dealing with several homophobic students in one class is very intimidating. Since I had that talk with Ray, he really hasn't said much to me. In fact, it seems that he's been trying to avoid any and all contact with me- no disrupting class, no homophobic remarks, not even a "hello!"
ReplyDeleteBut students are always going to find something "weird" about their teacher(s) to make fun of. If it's not being gay or feminine, then it would be something else... Good luck to you!
Haha. so how bout evidently one kid has made up a nickname for me and they make fun of me behind my back. he calls me "little mayonnaise". explain that one to me. i asked him why and he said he didn't know he just made it up. my kids are weird.
ReplyDeleteUltimately, this points to a fundamental strategy of homophobia--disrespect. There's a lot to unpack here. What does it mean that queerness is a basis upon which students can disrespect their teacher?
ReplyDeleteWell it is interesting that you ask the student to leave his views outside the class - to separate his personal and or religious beliefs - but do you? Not trying to argue - just asking a question.
ReplyDeleteI asked the student to leave his views outside my classroom because they are prejudiced and he has shown that he cannot express them appropriately. If there happened to be a GLBTQ student in my class who overheard his ignorant comments, how do you think that would make the student feel?
ReplyDeleteEssentially, I want to show this student that hatred of any sort will not be tolerated in my class.
To answer your question, though, I do not leave my beliefs outside my classroom. I am definitely all about learning from others (including me learning from my students), but intolerance and ignorance are two things that I will have control over in my classroom. It's not going to happen unnoticed and without consequence: period.
ReplyDeletewhat about someone that truly believes it is not right to be gay? maybe a sin. Calling them ignorant would be intolerant as well - yes? again not to argue - just asking
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely. It would absolutely be intolerant and for good reason. Students need to learn that, if this type of behavior occurs in the workplace or wherever they may end up, then consequences will more than likely follow. What would happen if they brought their homophobic attitudes into their place of work and they were in a "high-up" position? They could certainly be fired for discrimination.
ReplyDeleteDespite this, a person has no right to tell someone else how to live, how to be, or who to love. I know you will probably say that, by my believing this, I am telling someone how to live. Perhaps, but the bottom line is that it is MY classroom and I want all my students to feel appreciated. Having someone who is blatantly homophobic in my classroom will make anyone who is a part of the GLBTQ community, whether they are out or not, feel devalued and I am not okay with that.
Honor all - I agree... yet, you are not honoring those who disagree with you. They call you a queer - you get mad. You call them a homophob and they should not get mad?
ReplyDeleteBy the way, homophobic is not the right word - phobia means fear. I do not fear homosexuals, no more than you fear heterosexuals... you have let liberal teachings brainwash your language - thus attitude
Actually, homophobic is exactly the right word. Homophobia does not necessarily mean fear of homosexuals. Homophobia, as defined by Wikipedia (I know Wikipedia is not always a respectable source but this definition hits the nail on the head), is "a range of negative attitudes or feelings towards lesbian, gay, bisexual, and sometimes transgender and intersex people and behavior." Look at any other definition of homophobia and I guarantee that it will say exactly the same thing. A homophobe, therefore, is someone who engages in homophobia. In other words, if a person THINKS about, SAYS, or DOES anything negative to a queer person, then that person is a homophobe.
ReplyDeleteIn a nutshell, what I gather from your posts is that it is acceptable for gays or anyone with pro-LGBTQ ideals to play the "victim" of hate but what happens when it is turned around on those who might disagree with or disapprove of homosexuality? Why should that not be considered hate as well?
I understand this point, but focusing on such a claim will only lead to more of this mentality of "my way is right, your way is wrong." My purpose for this blog is not to change people's beliefs about homosexuality. If a person believes that being gay is "wrong," then that is their prerogative. My goal as a teacher is to open up my students' minds to new ways of thinking. If it so happens that I am responsible for opening a student's eyes to the fact that there is nothing wrong whatsoever with a person being gay, then wonderful!
No matter what, though, I want my kids to feel as though they can be themselves as long as they can respect others. Discussion about this issue is not out of the question, but it needs to be RESPECTFUL. If Ray believes that Johnny is gross for being attracted to other boys, then fine; but if Ray cannot express his opinions in a respectful manner, then there is no need for him to even open his mouth, which is EXACTLY what I asked of him after this situation transpired.